New Life

Ok, sorry buat semua tertunggu-tunggu. Writer sedang menstablekan her emotion... Before this, God knows how many times I tried to write about everything that happen to me since Nov but I have no words to describe my feeling that time. Until I today, I feel better... and I think am ready to share with you.

But I wanted to highlight, this entry, bukan tujuan nya untuk menghina, menagih simpati or ape-ape jelah yang buruk. It just I wanted TO SHARE my experience, the worst thing happen to me and my family.

November 2009. We still in a VERY HAPPY mode dengan kelahiran Aariz. Life is busy and noisy. We have no maid to help - means no one officially taking care of Aariz. Lucky I have many unused leaves and I attached with no project. So I can clear my leaves and stay at home taking care my both sons. This is still okay. Bie had his difficult time with his business but i can say not that bad since he still can support us.

But, out of nowhere, atas sikap dengki, busuk hati MEREKA, they took away his business in just a blink. They reason is the business is not stable and they want to give to someone else. How would you feel, the business that you had run for over 3 year, has been taken by other people without any notice? Without any discussion? This business mean a lot to us. We have been up and down but Alhamdulillah we still survive. We believe this difficult time is only temporary, we just need to be positive. But they disagree. They still took it away from us.

December 2009. Financially not stable. Too many problem to solve. Bie still kene siapkan kereta2 customer, and no profit. ;( So, can you imagine if suddenly your income was blocked and you have 2 kids who still young and of course need a BIG expense? And not to forget still need to pay business expense jugak, sbb ade kete customer yang tak siap lagi that time. It hurts me, and it hurts me more thinking that this has been done by them whom I called FAMILY. They are more than happy to see us suffer. Memang macam drama sandiwara semase tu. Kite sllu rase, eh takkan la family buat camni.. But that's the fact. Even dah jatuh begini pun masih lagi cuba terus menjatuhkan lagi. Enough said.

At this time, my mom's maid pulak buat hal. This is totally another story but it really adding up our tense and pressure. Bleh pulak bile my mom balik Mekah dia berlakon konon kitorg dera dia bleh??? Saborr jelah.. The worst, my mom termakan cerita2 dia.. So suasana agak tegang... bukan agak, tapi amat tegang di rumah. Huhuh... Indon ni kalo bab berlakon mmg hebat. Padahal aku punye la ngam ngan dia mase my mom tade, ttbe lak dia create citer cam ni.. memang ba alif ba ya btul! Padahal sebenarnye dia putus cinta ngn bf dia.. She told me everything but when my mom came back and saw that she cant focus to do her work, my mom pun sound2 la dia kan.. Then tu la dia nak put the blame on us... Konon kitorg yang buat dia sedih murung semua-semua lah... Macam haremmmm kan? Fitnah baekkk punye.. Pastu bile jage Aariz ngn Zaim, amik sambil lewa je.. Mane aku tak hot kan.. Nak marah taleh... Helooooo am not desperate ok nak suh ko jage anak aku... Konon la nak tolong jage, tapi buat cincai.. Boleh blah ye indon... Banyak lagi option aku bleh cari... So sebab bengang ngn keje dia yg ntah hape2 tu, I banned her to touch my sons. Walopun thats means no one take care of my kids, we need to solve this.. Huhuh tension sungguh mase ni... Nursery Zaim dulu dah penuh, nursery lain tak dapat kepercayaan kami... Tuhan je yang tau, betapa panic nye saya bile cuti mule habis... ;( 

It's hard for me and Bie to accept this but we believe Allah yang bagi rezeki. Sejauh mana mereka tu berdengki and tak pernah putus asa mencarik pasal dan mencipta 1001 alasan untuk menyusahkan hidup kami, kami tetap percaya semua yang jadi ade hikmahnye. Cuma waktu tu, kene kuat semangat to be positive, bangun balik demi anak-anak. Yes, they both are our strength. Tapi sesungguhnye I am thankful to Allah, walopun sedang face 1001 dugaan, our life still full with laughter ;) But THEM, they have everything else but not a HAPPY family. Itu memang pasti. Sebab tu asik tak puas hati...

Everyday I pray hard for Allah to give me strength, to guide me, to show me a way to get out from this problem.
 
Alhamdulillah. One by one.

• Bie is now employed. Not only that, he got promotion during his probation. Cool kan? Rezeki anak-anak ;) 
• When I was down thinking about who going to babysit Aariz, Rina offer to send him to her mom. Aku memang terharu beb mak ko tolong jagekan Aariz. Sampai mati aku ingat jasa ko ngan mak ko... Appreciate sgt. *HUG!* - tears drop! huhuhu
• Then maid sampai. so Aariz and Zaim stay with new maid. New maid, quite young, no experience but have a positive attitude. Not that good but still can be teach and all. I will give her time as she never has experience handling kids before...
• My emotion become more stable skg. Yes I've been so stress so sad and so blues. My hubby used to be around me. When running your own business of course you have extra time with your wifey and kids. And you have many times to settle all things. After he got the job, he is so damn busy, going out as early 7am and going back late night at 10pm. I felt left out, feels like being dump by my own hubby... Sedeihhh ok... I am not used to eat alone, to handle all kids stuff from A to Z without his help. Do ask how many times I merajuk ok... huhuh... Mase tu dah le tade maid, jadi am so tired so exhausted. Balik keje jammed, pastu nak melayan anak lagi, keje rumah lagi, Zaim lak tak biase jugak Babah tade jadi sgt sensitive and tantrum... Aariz tgh lasak... Kene iron baju lagi.. hahaha ni pun nak masuk dalam list.. heheh.. Ok dulu tak pernah iron baju.. Skg Bie dah keje office, kene la smart kan... Hard time... Really hard for me to adjust my new routine. Bile sume bende terbeban di bahu sendiri... Bile Bie balik selalunye kids dah tido... Tapi skg dah okay. Memang Bie masih busy. Malah akan selalu outstation which kitorg memang tak pernah berpisah even 1 day.. Hopefully I can handle this.. huhuuh... Skg mostly dia akan fly ke Johor balik hari je.. Yang ni pun agak sengsara jugak saya menunggu di rumah.. huhuuh... Hopefully tadelah Bie kene pergi mane-mane lame-lame.. Tak sanggup you... Winduuu.. Auuuwwww.. 

And now, we make another BIG move. Move out from my mom's house. Leaving our hometown Melawati yang telah kami duduk since we were babies. We decided to start our new life at new place. Moving out to Puncak Jalil, nearby my office. Zaim will be in new school soon. Hope he doesnt mind to have new classmate, leaving his good friends, Nana, Hanif, Azim, Fiqa and Adi. Oh just want to share, the good thing about QDees is your fees tak burn if you move to other branch.. Best kan? Meaning to say kalo kite move out to other places, you can just continue to send your kids to any nearby QDees. Fees kalo dah byr kt branch lame, diorg akan transfer the payment. ;)

Cume, in this area, am not really into Qdees. Kinrara branch do gives homework for EDP class. Oh my, I totally disagree with this. Zaim blom pun 3 tahun, takkan nk kene buat homework. Lain Qdees lain management ok.  Qdees Puncak Jalil tade swimming lesson. Hmm Left only Seri Petaling, owned by Chinese. Tade building sendiri like Setiawangsa branch. 17 students in the class and the class is quite smaller...But 2 teachers... Dulu kelas Zaim besar, and only 7 students.. I dont know if Zaim can accept this new environment or not. I am actually nervous to think that he might not like his school like he does before.. Or else, I have to find another school for him. Let's just try first. Tak cuba tak tau kan? Tomorrow, Zaim will start his 2nd term with new branch. His classmate mixed, Malay, Chinese and Indian. Even they have foreigner as well.. Cute btul anak negro tu.. ;) I will update this esok.. ;) Hope I made the right choice.

Btw, it only take about 10 min for me to reach our home from office. So tade la stress jammed ;) Sempat bawak kids pergi playground petang2.. Bestt wwooooo... Pasal maid, I have no words to say, but Tawakkal to Allah. I believe Him whom help me all these while. Mudah-mudahan nothing bad happen. But I will do spot check jugak la... Tgh hari if I have extra time I am surely balik rumah check the kids... So far, my maid ok lagi. Nothing to doubt. Adelah skit2 buat silap jugak selame sebulan kerja ni tapi bile dah di tegur tu dia cuba utk improve her work..

Buang yang keruh ambil yang jernih. Biarlah ape pun terjadi, family is still a family. My mom's maid dah tunjuk belang dia bile dia mintak cuti nak balik tapi didnt return back here. So now my mom sendiri dah tau perangai dia... End of story. Bcz for me, it's not my style nak badmouth dia like she did to me. I am not the same level with her. I leave it to Allah to show my mom the truth. And THEM who set us in trouble dah say sorry over their attitude. So we forgive them but not to forget. But no matter what, we still love them. Biarlah orang buat kite tapi kite jangan buat orang. Let's move on... Tak payah berdendam, nanti sendiri sakit jiwa. Afterall, we have better life now.. ;)

Thank you Allah, Thank you friend who always be there when we had our difficult time... Thanks for your support. God bless you all.. And Thanks to my kids, being so comel and cute, that really made my day... Hehehe You both rocks.. Without you, Mommy and Babah not sure we can go through this problem... Thanks my heroes.. 

Itu je nak share. ;) Itu je.. panjang gileeeeee pun bleh cakap itu jeee. hahah mesti muak korang bace panjang2 camni.. huhuh..